Indeed, sibling relationships are beautiful. When one supports the other in hardship, you will feel contempt. However, raising a child with autism often affects the whole family, especially siblings. While your neurotypical child might show incredible patience, they may feel left out, frustrated, or even resentful. 

At Jeevaniyam, we understand these challenges firsthand. Here’s how to nurture strong, loving sibling bonds while ensuring no one feels overlooked.

Why Sibling Relationships Need Extra Care?

When one child requires more attention, siblings often:

• Feeling invisible (“Mom always focuses on my brother.”)
• Acting out for attention (even negative attention counts)
• Taking on too much responsibility (“I have to be the perfect child”)
• Struggle with embarrassment (especially in public)

The good news? With the right approach, siblings can develop deep empathy, patience, and resilience – qualities that last a lifetime.

Practical Ways to Support ALL Your Kids

1. One-on-One Time (Non-Negotiable!)

• Schedule regular “dates” with each child – even 15 minutes daily helps.
• Let them choose the activity (reading, drawing, a quick game).
• Pro Tip: Use a visual calendar so kids see when their special time is coming.

2. Explain Autism in Kid-Friendly Terms

• For young kids: “Your brother’s brain works differently – loud noises hurt his ears more than yours.”
• For teens: Share autism videos or books that show different perspectives.
• Always emphasize: “This isn’t anyone’s fault – we’re a team.”

3. Create Fair House Rules

• Example:
  • “We use kind words with everyone” (even during meltdowns)
  • “Everyone gets turns for attention” (use a timer if needed)
  • “It’s okay to feel frustrated – come talk to me.”

4. Involve Siblings in Therapy (When Appropriate)

• Teach simple speech therapy games they can play together.
• Let them join sensory activities (like swinging or play dough).
• Caution: Never force this – siblings aren’t little therapists!

5. Validate Their Feelings

• Instead of: “Don’t be mad at your sister!”
• Try: “I get it – it’s hard when she interrupts your games. What would help?”

Real-Life Challenges & Solutions

Sibling Complaint	How to Respond
“Why does he get away with that?”	“His brain makes some things harder. Let’s think of ways to help him learn.”
“I’m tired of explaining my sibling to friends.”	Role-play responses: “He just likes different things than we do!”
“No one comes to my events because of autism stuff.”	Trade off parents at activities or invite grandparents for backup.

 

When to Seek Extra Support?

Consider professional help if siblings:

• Withdraw constantly (avoiding family time)
• Show anger toward the child with autism
• Develop anxiety or school problems

Jeevaniyam’s sibling support programs
✔ Express feelings through art/theater
✔ Meet others in similar families
✔ Learn autism awareness in fun ways

The Silver Lining

Many siblings of children with autism grow up to be:

• More compassionate adults
• Strong advocates for disability rights
• Incredibly adaptable problem-solvers

Your parenting matters: One mom told us her teen daughter now wants to study psychology because of her brother – “She says he taught her how people think differently.”

What Next for Families of Children with Autism?

1. Research the best engaging activities. You can always contact us for guidance.
2. Make a schedule for our sibling engagement.
3. Book a parent consultation with us if tensions feel unmanageable.

Every child in your family deserves to feel seen – including the “helpers.” We at Jeevaniyam Autism Care, Kochi, are here to make that balance possible.